Thursday, August 19, 2010

Short Movie Reviews

Killer Drag Queens on Dope got in my queue because Haji is in it. This is the story of two transvestites (again, I hope i am using proper LGBT language) who are assassins. Ginger (Alexis Arquette) is in charge and Coco is her student. Ginger's boyfriend is a mob hit-man, but not good at it. To raise money for Ginger's gender-reassignment surgery, she is doing the hits for him with Coco's aid. Oh, and they do a lot of drugs.

Verdict: Kind of fun. Kooky, campy, silly.

Touche pas à la Femme Blanche or Don't Touch the White Woman is a story of General Custer in 1974 Paris, fighting the First Nations for President Nixon. This was a strange movie, but interesting. The Americans are, at times, portrayed (and rightfully so) like the Nazis. The real villain is the industrial machine rather than the government. They are buying the Army and forcing the issue. This one is not likely for everyone, but surrealist history lovers should find it interesting. It is humorous at times, not overly disturbing unless you think about what was really going on at the time.

Verdict: Bizarre and interesting political satire.

Macumba Sexual has West African Voodoo and a near-constantly naked Lina Romay. This is a really great effort by Jess Franco, and one of his first movies made in Spain after he expatriated. It is trippy, dreamy film where you are not always sure what is really happening. It is quite sexually graphic, and not for more sensitive viewers in that regard. It is, however, a beautifully shot film that highlights Franco's gifts and creates a real sense of creepy fear. (DVD)

Verdict: Psychologically scary, sexy horror.

Ilsa: Tigress of Siberia Ilsa escapes the post-Stalinist purges to become a crime boss in Montreal. There she runs into the one prisoner that could give her away to her old Soviet enemies. Ilsa battles the other mob bosses while being chased by the Soviets in this Roger Corman, Ivan Reitman production. More of a spy/mob movie than a traditional Ilsa film. Kind of refreshing, though Thorne has been better. (R2 DVD)

Verdict: Worth the watch for Ilsa fans. Not as hardcore as the other films.

Exorcist II: The heretic has Regan returning to the dark-side as a psychologist and meddling priest try to figure out what happened to her, and how Father Merrin died. John Boorman (Excalibur, Zardoz, Deliverence) directs this one, and creates a scary dreamy world, particularly the portions set in Ethiopia. The story centers more on Father Lamont (Sir Richard Burton) than Regan (Linda Blair) as he investigates what killed his teacher, Father Merrin (Max von Sydow). The demon Pazuzu is strong in this one, and wants revenge for being defeated, but also has a bigger plot at hand.

Verdict: Not what I expected. Quite good and creepy.

Savage Island - What do you call a Linda Blair movie with next-to-no Linda Blair? "Savage Island," that's what. See that poster to the right? That is as good as it gets. This one appears to have been a Spanish WIP productions that had no stars. Someone said, "hey, lets put Linda Blair and some other noticeable names in the first five and last five minutes!" And that is just what they did. (Fancast)

Verdict: As low budget WIP it isn't horrible, but I have seen better.

The Erotic Adventures of Pinocchio features AiN favorite Dyanne Thorne as the fairy godmother. It is a silly, cheesey film, but is fairly funny. Dyanne Thorne is funny in a nice girl role for a change, and is only sporadically naked for comic effect. Karen Smith (H.O.T.S.) is hilarious as the madame Mabelle. Aside from a lot of nudity, the film is really no dirtier than your average Carry On film. Oddly, the film has a moral to it. It is a pretty standard moral, but one none-the-less. (DVD)

Verdict: A funny sex comedy with a moral.

The Secret Life of Bees is based on a novel, and like most movies based on novels, it has a hard row to hoe. See, the people who love novels remember the really funny parts and the really gut-wrenching parts. The movies tend to be a mish-mash of these two. This movie seems to walk the line pretty nicely, not beating you over the head with the sorrowful parts. (DVD)

Verdict: Enjoyable.

Night of the Demons - I am troubled that I have never seen this one. I don't know that I avoided it, per se, but never got around to watching it. Not a bad little Evil Dead rip off, if you ask me. It is silly and cheesy. Has a great soundtrack. Everyone in it has an entire can of Aqua Net in their hair. What more could you ask for? Linnea Quigley takes her clothes off and kills people (again). This movie is so '80s, I am surprised Loverboy isn't in it.

Verdict: Pretty classic, for the '80s.

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