Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Not Impressed

Many of you know I am not a fan of cop shows. I am so sick of Law & Order (all of them), CSI (all of them), NCIS... Even Bones gets on my nerves at times. I have to tell you, though, this new Hawaii Five-O is the worst. It is trite and contrived; a pastiche of all the others, mixed with some Hawaiian flavor just to throw you off the scent. They go way to far into CSI territory with their elaborate crime detection lab, while the new McGarrett (whatever) is channeling Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon much of the time.

The worst part was a bit where they were investigating the type of gun some pirates used. They asked a witness to pick the assault rifle from a series of pictures. She picked out the AK-47. "We got 'em now," one of them says (approximately). This bothers me for several reason. It is estimated that there is one AK-47 for every six people on Earth, so how does this narrow things down? Also, of course they had AK-47s! It is the assault weapon of choice for every paramilitary group in the world. Last, instead of asking the witness to pick out the gun, why didn't they just grab some of the cartridges littered about the boat. Pirates are not known for their cleaning skills, so there is certainly some brass laying about somewhere. I don't think I'll be watching any further episodes.

9 comments:

Ray Rousell said...

I couldn't agree more! What a load of old CRAP!

Darius Whiteplume said...

It is like they make cop show pilots with Mad-Libs - "Give me a noun and a place name."

The Angry Lurker said...

The only good thing is Scott Caan but that's it....awful.

Darius Whiteplume said...

He did not do much for me either, but it may have been the overall awfulness effecting my perception.

chris said...

Haven't seen it and didn't intend to but I have to ask, is it worse than the original? Is that even possible?

PS: Saw the Ayn Rand post on your tumblr and thought of this. You've probably seen it but I think it should be required at the end of every Rand post.
There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old's life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.

Darius Whiteplume said...

I don't think I have ever seen the original. Hmm.

Love that Rand bit. I love looking at the comments for that post. It is like no one knows what an awful and/or deranged person she was. I could not finish Atlas Shrugged, it was just too ridiculous. Anthem annoyed me, as the hero was supposed to be great because he found this old tech. Did not make any, just found it.

Dr. MVM said...

I tried to like it because I want to have sex with Grace Park but, damn, it sucks balls.

Darius Whiteplume said...

Agreed. :-)

chris said...

You've never seen the original H50? Well, go ahead, I dare you.
Taken in historical context it wasn't really that bad...Oh fuckit! Yes it was.

Ayn Rand awful and deranged? You're too kind. I think she was a sociopath who quite successfully promoted a diagnosis as a way of life. And the world is poorer for it.

On another note, have you seen Justified? It's my "cop show" this year. Timothy Oliphant makes a good US marshal and I ain't never ever going to rural Kentucky!

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