Wednesday, September 10, 2008

In the belly of the beast!

OK. I came to terms long ago with my nerdliness. So has my wife. She has for good or bad, however, led me into the land of the enemy... Jocks.

In an attempt to stave off middle age fat and general ill-health, she asked if I would goin a gym with her. Being like minded in regard to fat and degeneration, and since she is the one woman I get to see naked without shoving bills in her thong, I agreed. Little did I know how uncomfortable it could be.

I have not been in a gym since... well, I guess high school. Now in some attempt at faux geekdom, the machines all have buttons and lights. Everything looks like it is from the rough draft of ST:TNG Enterprise designs. The muscleheads move seamlessly from machine to machine, happily entering what one might consider "data" and pursuing their grunting hobby. Meanwhile I, a techie who is fearless about pulling apart even unknown computers, sure in my ability to get them going again, stare at this... thing... like it is the obelisque from 2001.

Well, I have decided that since I have not experienced sand-kicked-in-the-face reception one might imagine, I have decided to treat my forrays as a bit of an anthropology expedition (nerd!) and examine the geek/dork/nerd qualities of the standard gym-rat.

I promise to all my bretheren, if I somehow become some buff chiseled god of a man... As soon as I realize this has happened, I will wear a "Don't Make Me Roll Initiative" t-shirt.


Drizzt said...

love the shirt idea... do they sell that somewhere?

Darius Whiteplume said...

There are some at Cafe Press here. They probably stole the idea from Scott Kutz's PvP; he used to sell a shirt with one of his characters saying that.

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