Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Digital Diarhea

Once upon a time, I started a Facebook account. Not because my family uses it. Not because I wanted to get in touch with high school chums. Nope, because it had D&D Tiny Adventures. Like the rest of Facebook, I was destined for disappointment.

Then, later, I started a Twitter account. I had a very "what the hell is this for" view of things. Lately, however, I have been Tweeting (or Twatting, if you prefer) quite the blue streak. I have my reasons for liking it:

  1. It doesn't take much work. Sure, saying something insightful is satisfying and difficult considering the 140 character limit, but often I want to say "I like grilled cheese!" without fear of reprisal. Twitter is the place for such pronouncements.
  2. Feedback is almost instant, depending on who is Twatting at the time. The wise Twittador™ will tailor his Tweets to the present audience. They will then feed your sense of self by saying things like "you are so funny, Darius." Fortunately, they cannot format their text, so you can ignore that they mean "you are so funny, Darius." Being emoticon illiterate is a plus.
  3. You can chat with the stars. Some people do actually get responses from the famous (or near-famous), but really, who cares. The fact that I told Kat Dennings that I was sure the Entertainment Weekly photos she found so distressing were probably fine, and she should feel wonderful about herself as a person, is enough for me. I have consoled her, and she will be better for it. Not responding with, "aw, you are a lovely and talented cartoon wizard," is less important than not responding with, "ew, I bet you are creepy and nearing 40." I have feelings too, Kat.
  4. Little opportunity for run-on sentences. The grammatically sensetive among you are probably saying, "that Kat Dennings thing really went on for a while. I must diagram that sentence and see if it is proper use of the Queen's English." Well, in Twitter, this is not a problem for me. Also, I am not annoyed by the grammar of others, the fact that most of my Twitt friends use complete words, punctuation, and capitalization exceeds my expectations. I try not to use any other text-speak than the occasional "L8R" - which is really pre-internet, much like "SK8R."

Well, that is all for now. I have been off Twitter for nearly 10 minutes while writing and proofreading this bit of internet solipsism. Proofreading; another thing you can ignore in Twitter :-)


iasa said...

I have the same problem with twitter I have with becoming a stripper. If even drunk men won't pay attention to you, that is a level of rejection I don't need. I have a mother for that ;)

Darius Whiteplume said...

I get a fair response from drunk men when I strip.

Unknown said...

I agree that twitter has made the world wayyyy too small. Especially in regard to celeb twats (sp?).

Darius Whiteplume said...

"celeb twats" - hey, nobody makes them not wear underwear. Oh, wait! You meant... Sorry :-D

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