Thursday, August 20, 2009

Does "with everything" still mean "with everything"?

I don't want to get too philosophical here, but I am confused...

Say you go to get a sub (or hoagie, or grinder) for lunch.

"Sandwich Artist" - What would you like on it?

Darius Whiteplume - "Everything"

SA - "Do you want pickles?"

DW - "Sure, everything."

SA - "Mayonnaise?"

DW - "Uh, yeah. Everything."

SA - "JalapeƱos?"

Okey, I could go on and on.

I hate to sound like a cranky old man (I am cranky, and I am old, but not a "cranky old man"), but invariably when I order a sub I go through this. Since I don't eat meat-with-feet, I tend to get the veggie sub, and if there is anything you do want on a veggie sub, it's everything! Saying "all the way" doesn't help any either.

I don't know what happened to "with everything" but have some ideas.

1. Anchovies: In my mind, the original "with everything" food was the pizza. Somewhere along the way, people stopped liking anchovies, so many pizza places stopped having them. So, perhaps people would order "with everything" from a place with anchovies, and then complain "there are freakin' anchovies on my pizza!" Certainly these pizzerias would start asking, and I have even seen pizza boxes with "Eveything" and "Everything/No Anchovies" check boxes on the side.

2. Strange Peppers: We went through a bit of a pepper phase, and more places started having more types of peppers. Green bells are most common, but some places have banana peppers and jalapeƱos, which some people might not like. I get it. Frankly I don't like green bell peppers.

Ultimately though, I don't think either of these things matter with what I experience. I am in front of the person making the sub, and they are continually asking what I want. I am not sure if they are not paying attention, or if my little burg has a problem with people asking for "everything" and then going "whoa, whoa, whoa! What is that, lettuce?!?"

I'll shut up now. Enjoy your lunch.


wiec? said...

funny thing. the other day i was at Subway and the lady in front of me said "put everything on it." the guy loaded it up. 2 minutes after she paid for it and he was in the middle of making my sandwich and she came back in huff.

she said to the guy "you put mayo and mustard on this. and spicy peppers. i didn't want those." so the guy stopped making my sandwich and remade hers. she added as he was doing it "don't put pickles on it either." he gave me a "can you believe this shit?" look.

i try to keep it simple with the poor sandwich artists.

most people don't eat anchovies any more because Zoidburg's people ate them all.

Darius Whiteplume said...

That is funny. Maybe someone should do a Cognitive Linguistics paper on "with everything?"

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